“In the name of Rose”

“Love is an Irresistible Desire..” …My friend use to tell us those days… and then….we all use to laugh at him… I dnt know why…..but I regret it now and as the optimistic soul of this world I “believe”…”Love is the most irresistible desire of human life..”

 Once upon a time in my life I was 17 and It was the time of dusk, a fine clear evening of a day with silent notions of uncertainty around its ambiance…..I didn't knew “why” but was sure, something out there is related to my soul, my being in this mortal world.... i sensed that quiet surely. The atmosphere was gloomy and the day (for namesake lets call it 29^th October 2002) was ready to write a new chapter in my life with un erasable experience of life time. Sun set was about to take place and a “un forgettable” evening was waiting to hug me… an evening which was in love with me. ..!!!

I was uninformed that I was the victim of the day but now I can relate each and every action for sure….  Cupid had his sheer piece of plan to struck me with his golden bow and today.. I accept it with full consent …he was successful in doing that..

Dnt know how…But I can feel the glimpse of each and every object which was around me that day in front of my eyes right now.. the moment was so special to me.. It was the day my school organized a sport event and believe me…It was a grand inauguration. An evening full of renowned names , crowd, lights, roars, athletes, committee  members , principle , teachers , students and then …..i noticed a Rose at a distance of few yards from me… full of innocence.. full of life... yes ..full of LIFE..

Dnt know why..but my life took a pause that moment and I was bound to stop at that point …  This is the point where I got stuck and my world got still.…never seen anything giving this much aesthetic pleasure to my eyes.. thoughts , gesture , state of mind… There was something on her face which I was related to me , my consciousness.. Even today I dnt know what it was,… but yes…it was there.. Her simplicity was something which made her look apart from the crowd…. And I was at the spectator end that moment having a glimpse of her simplicity..

An immediate thought of infatuation struck me with full impact. Innocence on her face was playing on my mind and I was ignorant of everything around me… I was still and numb…as if doped…  A series of sequences started running in my mind resulting in a “Catch 22” situation,,,complete dilemma with hordes of questions … Whats next ? What can I do now..? ignore her majestic spell and move ahead? OR was I missing a chance to talk to her? Will she talk to me? OR is she too gud for a dumbo like me?

Well..there were lot many questions…But then,….Finally a answer came to me and as they say it Shakespeare’s way…She's beautiful, and therefore to be wooed; She is woman, and therefore to be won”… 

Dnt know from where …but my soul was bound to say..” NO Sukesh, You can not let her go… You simply can not let her go like this…” Its like as they say that those 4 golden words came to me …”She is the one I was waiting for”..

Well then they say that the Battle of Troy was the deadliest war fought on this earth…But they dnt know ..there were many unsung stories and one such was battlefield I was dealing with that moment…”gathering courage and bravery of approaching her,..” Seriously buddy....it takes lifetime of ur manliness to approach a lady…and that too… the condition is worse if you are doing this first time in your life..

Meanwhile…Rose was steady and calm… she was with her friend sitting on a chair…and was ignorant of a boy who was thinking about her… A boy who wanted to talk to her.., I started planning a conversation in my mind… I decided that i will say :

“Hi”…or may be ..a ”Hello” would sound more decent… ?

“What should I speak when she replies back”…and what if she does not replies.. ?

Should I ask her out for a coffee….?? Ahhh....dat will sound more desperate..

Well , it was as funny as it is.. What d Hell I was doing dat moment…I still laugh remembering that time... What an idiot I was..

But then yes …finally all the planning was done .. Ready to move on battlefield with loads of courage…infact lifetime of my courage… J

My first step towards her was on the move…I was at an distance of 15 meters from her and she seemed to be at a distance of 1000 meters from me..:)

Slowly and gradually I started my walk. I approached her… I was walking…she is now at 2 meters ..”Oh God, she is looking at me”…and then i crossed her to a walk straight away for another 15 meters opposite of her…..

The same story was repeated for 3 more times…. And I was back to my original position…15 meters away from her.. :D.. It was funny as it is, and finally I gave up.. L… thought this is not my cup of tea..its better to get killed in battle field than to be embarrassed .. I should die in glory…

Its like I was jammed..Neither I was able to move away from her..niether I had the courage to approach her…But then I saw a ray of hope coming towards me…

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“Hey Neha.. Thank God tum aa gayi…how m I looking..??”

“Are you mad or wat.. as usual u r looking idiot.. :P”

“Are seriously yaar..batao.. it’s a question of life and death..”

“Aisa kya…hmmm luking…ok , ok”

“Yaar mujhe usse baat karni hai” (pointing towards Rose)

“Kya..propose maarna hai kya,, J J”

“Nahi yaar, its not bout propose, I want to talk to her,. The innocence on her face is making me talk to her.. I dnt know what it is but this is something I have never felt before”

“Tu to gaya kaam se bacchu..” :D

And then Neha didn’t even waited for my words and she straight away went towards Rose .. “What the fuck I have done.. no I shud run and hide somewhere. but its an open ground…where shud I go…Oh God…i should close my eyes..” :D :D :D

I was praying to God and all my conversation planning went to ground zero..a total balck … and my legs were shivering …. I knew the bow has being fired and now I have to face it…

And then that moment came which I will cherish through out my life… I heard that soothing voice….Those words which penetrated my heart so deep that ….i felt like yes..its the voice which i wanted to hear every morning when I wake up...   through out my life time...

"Yes Sukesh... what happened ??"

i turned back and saw a smile on her face which meant to me like a world... she was innocent and humble enough to come to me to which she didnt knew.....that from that moment  this boy will be taking her with him forever...

"Can i get your email address ?"

"why...tum mera mazak banana chahte ho na..??"

"kyun..tumhe aisa kyu laga"

"coz Ullas and Prashant are making fun of me.., in the name of Salmaan Khan" :) (she is too sweet to understand my feelings) 

"Nopes..bus aise hi .."

"ok its…, "I_am_not_so_stupid_to_mention_her_mail_here@gmail.com" :)

"Thanks"

What a relief it was for me..

Unknowingly the next day I proposed her through an e-mail…those golden words which were there in my heart finally came out… I told her… “I LOVE YOU ROSE “

That was the moment, which i considered to be the most special moment of my life .....coz Rose was on her way to enter my life with me waiting my arms open for her..

Next day when I went to school, she was standing with her friends..i saw a smile on her face which made me believe that at least  she is not annoyed of my mail…dats gud.. that means I can wait for reply…

we dint talked till 7 months after my proposal… and even I dint pushed her for the same..But yes..the winter of 2002 was special.. Every day I use to come to school early and see if Rose blue color scooty is present or not.. In assembly prayer when every student was praying, I use to open my eyes and look at her.. I didn’t miss up a single chance to look to her…

Then the day came when Rose opened her arms to accept me…she accepted my love..

The irony of the story is that Rose helped me to speak for the first time those 3 words to her… and she replied back..”I love you to Sukesh..” … I was on seventh heaven after listening that.. my heart got a satisfaction which can not be written over here..

And then we met for the first time as the lover…believe me..she was looking more prettier then than before when I saw her…

Its 2011 now... I had a very short span of beautiful 9 years with Rose… I believe each moment spent with her was special and my search for “Pursuit of Happiness” ends here….

Well still scribbling my experience in this mortal world and will come up with my more words on this post soon.. What, you didn't like that? huh.. 9 years is a long time and to express  , it takes a lil bit time to put them in words... :)

Take care.!